DOOM!

I'm sitting here at my desk, staring at lovely Mont Blanc... well, it's a picture of the mountain, but it is quite beautiful. I'm a bit afraid of the future. Busy season starts back up in about a week. I can look back on last busy season with an optimistic viewpoint. I was working very consistent 12 hour days, and Saturdays, and I was doing pretty well. I think emotionally I was starting to wear, but physically I did alright.

So why am I frightened now? Well, I was out at a client over last busy season, and had a relatively predictable schedule. This busy season I'm going to be in the office, where 3am is a pretty typical time for people to leave, and still come in the next day at 9. I want to try really, really hard not to become bitter and resentful. I hope that I can practice patience and love, but most days when I am here I wonder why it is I work at this job, and we're not even busy yet.

I was in training a few weeks ago, and we had to do this personality test thing. It was quite humorous... probably 3/4 of the class was in the "go-getter, goal driven, factual, logical" category. Then Steph lopes up to the front of the room to put her "X" in the "emotional, people-person, creative" category. Only a few others in the room slinked up to the front of the room to join me. I just realized (not for the first time) how very different my goals and expectations from a job are than most people here at Deloitte.

Please see post about me and the Peace Corps!!!

I think it's time for a truffle... mmmmm, chocolate can make some things seem brighter : )